I’ve never met a tradition I didn’t like. I’m sentimental and maybe a touch overly ambitious. Usually those characteristics serve me well, but this month in particular they’ve caused grief. Like most moms, I have this long list of ideal Christmas traditions we must do for it to be Christmas. We have to make peanut butter balls, attend certain Christmas parties and services, and if we don’t make a special craft just prep my casket. I could go on. As I’m typing this I’m realizing I’ve likely bitten off more than I can chew most years. But this year, I got a special dose of humbling. And in a strange way, I’m grateful.
This year we got a nasty stomach bug right in the middle of the Christmas season. I know we aren’t alone and lots of moms have been through illness at Christmas before. It’s just the name of the game when it comes to raising little kids. My mom told me a story about one year when my brother was little when she had to crawl on her hands and knees to put gifts out because of how sick she was. So I don’t share this story with you as some harrowing story of overcoming insurmountable difficulty. This will not make it in my memoir. But it did give me an important reality check that I thought might help a few others too (ideally without the stomach bug).
The timing of our illness caused us to miss my daughter’s co-op party, my husband’s work party, my brother’s birthday, a baby shower, a special Christmas performance at church, our small group party, and my sons’ MDO parties. So suffice it to say, I was feeling the loss of those events. And feeling pretty sorry for myself and my family. One day when I was truly down the for the count and my husband was working, my kids watched movies from 8 am until 7 pm. Which I wouldn’t normally share with the internet but it led to the crux of this all. The next night when we thought we were finally getting well (ignorant bliss), my kids asked for a movie night. But because of the copious amounts of screen time the day before, I suggested a game night instead. Did I feel like playing games? Not really. Did rotting on the couch and sipping a sprite sound better? Yes. But it was almost bedtime so I mustered up the strength to be 10% a better mom than I had the energy for.
Here comes the shift in perspective promised.
We had a great night. We played slow, easy games and had probably our best family night since before Halloween. It felt like the magic always promised by the Christmas season. I wasn’t searching for the matching hair bow or prepping a dessert for some event. I was just enjoying time with my family. And that’s when it all hit. Picture the Grinch’s heart growing three sizes but instead it was my brain.
I thought all of our special Christmas memories had to come from special events or extra effort on my part. There’s no denying that’s part of the Christmas joy. But the best night of our whole Christmas season was thanks to an ill-timed stomach bug and a deck of Uno. When my kids think back on their childhood Christmases, I want their memories to be filled with each other, scripture, and hymns. Not just the back row of our minivan and a mom who had too much on her plate. Although they’ll probably get both. So all of this is to say, I hope you’ll join me in setting aside nights and homeschool days in your Christmas season where you go no where special and do nothing special. Don’t wait for a stomach bug to force you to slow down.
